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Examining My (Conflictingly) Poly Self

I know that I’m poly, to some level.

I call myself “theoretically polyamorous,” as in, I know that I’m capable of being being attracted to or in love with multiple people at once, but I don’t put it into practice in my life, i.e. in a practical sense, I am monogamous.

There are many reasons for this. When I think about how I act when I’m dating someone, it takes enough time and energy to just do that with one person that I can’t imagine putting equal time and attention on even more people. Also, contradictorily, I can be [...]

10 reasons why I shouldn’t have had sex, but did anyway

As a preface, I just want to say that I expect you to realize that, obviously, I’m not trying to say that (promiscuous) sex is inherently “bad.” You can have sex for good reasons and bad reasons; you can have sex safely, or you can do it in ways that hurt yourself and others. I also want to say that this post isn’t meant as a guide of sorts – though if you do come away with some new insights, then great. Basically, though, it’s exactly what the title indicates it is. You guys probably have lists of your own. [...]

How to Have a Kickass Relationship

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After having had several LTR’s the past few years, I’ve got it figured out how a relationship works. Here it is.

Firstly, my simple model of evaluating a relationship is spot on. There are two components, Companionship and Sex, and I rate them on a scale of 1-10. For me, the sex has to be at least a 9 and the companionship a 6. If I have those two things at those levels I’m pretty much set. I don’t bother overthinking all the stuff that goes into a relationship (communication, commonalities, pets, religion, etc) because those are details and the [...]

The Relationship Reset Technique

I’ve been doing some experimenting with my relationships recently and one thing I’ve found is that straight up communication isn’t that effective. When I say communication, I mean sitting down and talking face-to-face. Talking is useful and has it’s place, but more is needed.

What I’ve found is that something has to happen in the relationship, basically a process that leads to a confrontation. I call this process a change agent. In a recent relationship, I had a girlfriend that was taking my for granted. I used this technique: I froze her out for a week, withheld contact and affection, [...]

Rori Asks: What’s Your Absolute Best Relationship Tip of All Time?

Every Tuesday I ask a question so we can all answer it! My answer is written in the post, and you can tell everyone your answer with a comment – or feel free to write your own blog post about the topic and link to it in the comments below! Read more Rori Asks posts here.

This Week’s Questions: What’s your absolute best relationship tip of all time?

Recently, as I was just surfing the Internet, I came across a really great article on Single Dad Laughing called “16 Ways I Blew My Marriage.” At the end, he also [...]

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